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happy slaps to all.

Willem Dafoe to play Rudi Giulani in new bio-pic!

Watch out Oliver Stone your George W. Bush bio-pic has competition. It looks like Two Time Academy Award Nominee Willem Dafoe will once again wear this “Shadow of The Vampire” make up but this time we won’t be playing Nosferatu. He’ll be playing the former major of New York City Rudi Giuliani. No other casting information has been released at this time but look for camera to roll the second the writer’s strike is over.

Katherine Heigl to star in "27 Dresses Later"

After the success of “Knocked Up” the entertainment industry is buzzing that Emmy Award winner Katherine Heigl is the newest Romantic Comedy Queen. This belief was further backed up when positive buzz started building around he latest project “27 Dresses”. Well Katie is determined not to fall into the Sandra Bullock/Meg Ryan trap of being stuck in cutsie roles.
Presuming the writers strike is over by summer she will star in “27 Dresses Later”. The film will be an interesting hybrid between “27 Dresses” and “28 Days Later”. In the film a strange alien virus affects all the bridesmaids all over the world and turns them into zombies. Heigl will be the lead Zombie.

The tagline for the film is “When there is no more room in the dressing room. The dead bridesmaids will walk the earth”

Look for more than one person in the movie to say “Always a bridesmaid never a ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.”

Britney Spears begs the gay slapper to "Love Me" in an attempt to finally get slapped!

As Fake Gossip News reported back in November 2006 Britney Spears has been destroying her career in an attempt to get attacked by the gay slapper. But time and time again the gay slapper has refused to slap her. Insiders have told Fake Gossip News that the gay slapper refuses to attack celebrities who are clearly trying to get slapped.

As we all know Britney’s antics have only gotten worse in the last year. From the head shaving, to the multiple stays in rehab, to the disastrous Video Music Award performance all the way to her recent trip to the hospital it has been one cry for a slap after another.

Well Britney made her most desperate attempt yet to get slapped last night. She tracked down the gay slappers home address and stood out side of his apartment begging him to love me. She stood outside for an hour hoping he would come out and slap her but he never did. All he did was drop a dime on her and call the cops. As the cops escorted Britney off the property the gay slapper yelled out of his window “You keep this shit up and I’ll never slap you. And plus I’m turning states evidence on your ass.” Britney’s last words were another plea for the gay slapper to “Love Me”.

Fake Gossip News has put together a remix of her asking the gay slapper to “Love Me” enjoy.

Keanu Reeves set to star in “Watching Paint Dry: The Movie”

Hollywood continues to find creative ways to get around the writers strike and we aren’t just talking about the Golden Globes being cancelled or Jimmy Kimmel appearing on Jay Leno or Jay Leno appearing on Jimmy Kimmel. First Meryl Streep signed on to star in “Reading The Phone Book: The Movie”. Now Keanu Reeves is set to star in “Watching Pain Dry: The Movie”.

For years people have said that watching Keanu act is about exciting as watching paint dry. Well the film, to be directed by Jonathan Demme, is set to put that to the test. Will consist of a continues split screen. On one half of the screen will be a room with paint drying and on the other half of the screen will be Keanu reading Shakespearian monologues.

Keanu’s fans are already celebrating this chance to prove his detractors wrong!

Meryl to take on the most difficult role of her career.

As the writer’s strike drags into it’s third month Hollywood is searching for a way to get new movies into production without the help of WGA members. Well New Line Cinema has found a way. Fourteen time Academy Award Nominee Meryl Streep has just signed on to play the only role in “Reading The Phone Book: The Movie”. For decades people have been saying that Streep is such a good actress that they would pay to see her read the phone book. Well, New Line Cinema, Streep and director Penny Marshall are betting on that being true. The film is nothing more than a single shot film involving Meryl walking into the frame, picking up the phone book, sitting in a chair and reading from it. The film begins shooting next week and is set to hit theatres in October.

Miss Cleo Caught In Spears Pregnancy Scandal!!

The world was shocked last week when Jamie Lynn Spears announced she was pregnant at the tender age of sixteen!! It turns out the scandal doesn’t end there!!

Fake Gossip News has learned that the baby actually isn’t Jamie Lynn‘s! The baby actually is Britney Spears third child. Three and a half months ago Britney learned she was pregnant again. She was thrilled but was worried what the news of another pregnancy would do to her already faltering “comeback” attempt. That’s when Britney turned to psychic and voodoo queen Miss Cleo. Britney paid Miss Cleo $2.5 million to use an ancient voodoo spell to magically transport the baby from Britney’s womb into Jamie Lynn’s!

Will the madness with the Spears family ever end?!? But at the same time Fake Gossip New would like to be the first to welcome Miss Cleo back into the public’s consciousness.